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May 27, 2005

Pardon Me While I Throw Up

"Regarding Bounce," says a correspondent who read my May 23 entry about the revolting smell of America's favorite fabric softener, "here's an e-mail that has been making the rounds. It had to be written by the people who make Bounce. Maybe it can help explain why you smell it everywhere."

My mail carrier told me that the U.S. Postal Service sent out a message to all letter carriers to put a sheet of Bounce in their uniform pockets to keep yellowjackets away. Use them all the time when playing baseball and soccer. I use it when I am working outside. It really works. The yellowjackets just veer around you. So do mosquitoes.

And all this time you've just been putting Bounce in the dryer!

It will chase ants away when you lay a sheet near them.

It also repels mice. Spread sheets around foundation areas, or in trailers or cars that are sitting, and it keeps mice from entering your vehicle.

It takes the odor out of books and photo albums that don't get opened often.

Because it's designed to eliminate static cling, it can also keep dust off your television or computer screen. Just wipe the screen with a used sheet of Bounce.

Dissolve soap scum from shower doors. Clean with a sheet of Bounce.

Freshen the air in your home. Place a sheet of Bounce in a drawer or hang it in the closet.

Put a Bounce sheet in the vacuum cleaner.

Prevent thread from tangling. Run a threaded needle through a sheet of Bounce before beginning to sew.

Prevent musty suitcases. Place an individual sheet of Bounce inside empty luggage before storing.

Freshen the air in your car. Place a sheet of Bounce under the front seat.

Clean baked-on foods from a cooking pan. Put a sheet in a pan, fill it with water, let it sit overnight, and sponge it clean. The anti-static agent apparently weakens the bond between food and metal.

Eliminate odors in wastebaskets. Place a sheet of Bounce at the bottom of the wastebasket.

Collect cat hair. Rubbing the area with a sheet of Bounce will magnetically attract all the loose hairs.

Eliminate static electricity from Venetian blinds. Wipe the blinds with a sheet of Bounce to prevent dust from resettling.

Wipe up sawdust from drilling or sandpapering. A used sheet of Bounce will collect sawdust like a tack cloth.

Eliminate odors in dirty laundry. Place an individual sheet of Bounce at the bottom of a laundry bag or hamper.

Deodorize shoes or sneakers. Place a sheet of Bounce in your shoes or
sneakers overnight.

Put a Bounce sheet in your sleeping bag and tent before folding and storing them. Keeps them smelling fresh.

Point the way, mice -- I'm going with you.

Posted by Terry Dunkle at May 27, 2005 11:28 PM

Comments

Does this person work for the company that manufactures Bounce, or do they have just a whole lot of free time on their hands?

Posted by: Marina at May 30, 2005 10:59 AM

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